Let myself down to set myself up
I am frustrated. My overanalytical mind is capable of magnifying even the simplest of words, gestures, and actions only to dissect details or maybe even create details that didn’t even exist in the first place. I create the worst scenario in my head so I feel better when I know it didn’t really happen, but why do I always have to do this? It’s pretty sick how I let myself down to set myself up. That doesn’t make any sense at all. Why do I torment and trick my mind into thinking of the worst case scenarios? That’s practically training my mind to think negatively, and I don’t want to be that kind of person. My mind likes to play tricks on me, hoodwinking common sense; common feelings, replacing them with insecure emotions that shred the very core of my being. I start to feel sick to my stomach and I get the pulsing headache that is a reminder of my sick thoughts.
And the worst part is, it’s no one’s fault but my own. I think there’s something wrong with me.